Mindfuck - It's all about understanding.

Emailed in by one of our readers, Josh.

You: hello

Stranger: hello

You: im josh

Stranger: im josh!

You: i find it hard to believe

Stranger: i find you hard to understand

You: what isnt hard to understand for you

Stranger: you're hard?

You: would it be hard to understand?

Stranger: are you hard for understanding?

You: If i did a handstand while hard would that be hard to understand?

Stranger: if you did a hard-stand would you be under?

You: Understand i would do a hard handstand under the stands while not understanding how hard it is to understand a hard handstand.

Stranger: congratulations

Your conversational partner has disconnected.

If you liked this lolmegle sketch you may also like funChat #1,Shocker #1, Francais aime le cyber, Shocker #3, Note to self - Omegler's momma's...no go..

The conversation that was too difficult to name.

Emailed in by the ever challenging, Nir G.

You: yes.

Stranger: yeah?

You: of course

Stranger: HOLY FUCK

Stranger: HARDER

Stranger: AHHH

You: FASTER

Stranger: MMM MOREEE

Stranger: AHH

Stranger: FASTER

You: wait a second is that an Avocado?

Stranger: 0.0

Your conversational partner has disconnected.

If you liked this lolmegle sketch you may also like Tame Rejection, Desperation, The Racistinator...The Jew, God damn North Koreans and What does that spell?

You can talk all you like, but at the end of the day it's all about thug aim.

Emailed in by one of our readers, the surreal David Suursoo.

Stranger: can i shove you in my dick and fuck a girl with you inside my dick and cum you into said girl?

You: i don't know your name, stranger, but i like you already

Stranger: =D

You: now, while you're doing this, can i have you shoved into MY dick, so that when you cum me into her i'm cumming you into her?

Stranger: YES PLEASE

You: this is a good plan brother.

Stranger: can it be purple goo?

You: infinitely, we shall be crammed into each other, and cum each other into things.

You: unto the tiniest bits of creation.

Stranger: LIKE A CANNON BALL!

You: a cannonball of infinite purple cum.

Stranger: this is quite the paradox

Stranger: I love you

You: yea, for unto this we shall eventually behold the face of god.

You: and then cum upon it

You: woah, woah woah!

You: who said anything about love?

Stranger: WHAT IS LOVE!?!

You: wow, you're getting kind of clingy, yes?

Stranger: baby dont hurt me...

You: no more

You: what is love?

You: baby?

Stranger: baby dont hurt me!

You: don't hurt me...

Stranger: cum cannon ball

Stranger: draw me a picture of it

Stranger: its my fetish

You: it'll look like this

You: .................................................. ............,-~~'''''''~~--,,_

.................................................. ........................,-~''-,:::::::::::::::::::''-,
.................................................. ....................,~''::::::::',::::::: :::::::::::::|',
.................................................. ...................|::::::,-~'''___''''~~--~''':}
.................................................. ...................'|:::::|: : : : : : : : : : : : : :
.................................................. ...................|:::::|: : :-~~---: : : -----: |
.................................................. ..................(_''~-': : : ::: : : : : :
.................................................. ..................'''~-,|: : : : : : ~---': : : :,'--NEVER GONNA GIVE YOU UP
.................................................. .......................|,: : : : : :-~~--: : ::/ --NEVER GONNA LET YOU DOWN!
.................................................. ..................,-''':: :'~,,_: : : : : _,-'
.................................................. ............__,-';;;;;:''-,: : : :'~---~''/|
.......................................................__,-~'';;;;;;/;;;;;;;: :: : :____/: :',__
........................................ .,-~~~''''_;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;',. .''-,:|:::::::|. . |;;;;''-,
......................................,' ;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;|;;;;;;;;;;;. . .:::::,'. ./|;;;;;;;;;;;;;|
...................................,-'';;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;',: : |__|. . .|;;;;;;;;;,';;|
.................................,-";;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;',;;;;;;; ;;;; . . |:::|. . .'',;;;;;;;;|;;/
................................/;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;|;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;; ;;. . |::|. . . |;;;;;;;;|/
............................../;;,-';;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;,';;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;,;;;;;;; ;;; |..|. . . .|;;;;;;;;|
.........................../;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;,;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;; ;;;;;;;'', |.;|. . . . ;;;;;;;|
..........................,~'';;;;;;;;;; ;;;;;;;;;;;,-'';;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;|. |.;|. . . . .|;;;;;;;|
......................,~'';;;;;;;;;;;;;; ;;;;;;;;,-';;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;',;;;;;;| |:|. . . . |;;;;;;;|
.....................,';;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;; ;;;;;;;/;;;,-';;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;,;;;;;| |:|. . . .'|;;',;;;;;|
....................|;,-';;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;,-';;;,-';;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;,;;;;| |:|. . .,';;;;;',;;;;|_
..................../;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;,-'_;;;;;;,';;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;; |.|:|. . .|;;;;;;;|;;;;|''''~-,
................../;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;/_'',;;;,';;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;; ,;;| |:|. . ./;;;;;;;;|;;;|;;;;;;|-,,__
................/;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;,-'...|;;,;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;; ;;;;;| |:|._,-';;;;;;;;;|;;;;|;;;;;;;;;;;'''-,_
............../;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;,-'....,';;,;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;; ;;;;;;;;|.|:|::::'''~--~'''||;;;;;|;;;;;;;;;;,-~''''~--,
............,';;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;,'....../;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;; ;;|.|:|::::::::::::::|;;;;;',;;;;;;;;;''-,: : : : : :'''~-,:'''~~--,
.........../;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;,-'......,';;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;; ;;;;;;;;;;;;|:|:|::::::::::::::',;;;;;;|_''''~--,,-~---,,___,-~~'''__''~-
........,-';;;;;;;;;;;;;;;,'......../;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;; ;;;;|:|:|:::::::::::::::|;;;;;;|.................. ...''-,_''-,''-,''~
......../;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;/.......,-';;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;; ;;;;;;;|:|:|:::::::::::::::|;;;;;|................ .............._''

Stranger: =D

You: you just got rick rolled.

Stranger: There was was a man whom was old

Stranger: who drank beer whenever it got cold

Stranger: he picked up his cup, said never gonna give you up!

Stranger: Oh damn, you just got limerickrolled

You: *golfclap*

Stranger: thank you

You: very smooth. excellent form.

Stranger: should we shove eachother in our urethras now?

Stranger: im getting ancy

You: like two ships, passing in the night, spewing purple cum cannonballs at each other, i fear we shall never meet again, stranger.

You: however, your memory, and our shared infinite purple jizz, shall live on, inside my dick.

Stranger: i feel the same

You: tis a sad sad day.

Stranger: i shed tears

You: but then, i say to myself, 'thug aim'.

Stranger: i weep for the fact that my dick remains unstuffed

Stranger: thug aim...

You: fear not, my friend. for i am there.

Stranger: thu game...

Stranger: THE GAME

Stranger: FUCK YOU!

Your conversational partner has disconnected.

If you liked this lolmegle sketch you may also like Have you found Jesus?, A Wild Omegle Appears!and Double-own.

Note to self - Irony is lost in omegle..

Stranger: hey. im a bi/lezz girl looking for another bi/lezz girl.

You: im a lesbo :)

Stranger: really?

Stranger: i dont believe you

You: oh?

You: why's that

Stranger: because ive tallked to at least 5 guys pretending to be bi/lez girls

Stranger: and im getting sick of it

You: oh

You: how would you know they were pretending in the first place?

Stranger: they would tell me at the end before disconnecting.....

You: oh

You: as in a prank?

Stranger: yuppp

You: well thats irritating

You: i dont know what to say, how to convince you :S

You: to be honest thats happened to me a couple of times too

Stranger: it is

You: not more than once in a row though

Stranger: oh

You: yea

You: should i leave then?

Stranger: no.

Stranger: you dont have to

You: hmmmmm

You: how are you then?

You: :)

Stranger: good.... prettyyyy horny.... hbu?

You: hahaha now that you mention it, im about the same

You: cam? ;)

Stranger: i have no webcam

You: then how am i going to show you my massive 9 inch black cock? :(

You: VAGINA*

You: i mean vagina

You: my massive vagina.

Stranger: you guys think your so fucking funny, your just gay frustrated little boys

Your conversational partner has disconnected.

If you liked this lolmegle sketch you may also like She'sAFishButNotReally, Concoction of the Day, God damn North Koreans and What does that spell

Cost of laptop - $1500, cost of connecting to the internet - $50, having a stranger on omegle e-mail a conversation you just had with him to your website...priceless.

Emailed in by one of our readers, JCulv.

You: the answer is nigger, what is the question?

Stranger: ummm

Stranger: what is the politically incorrect term for a black man?

Stranger: owned.

You: oh, sorry, but the term 'black man' is incorrect. that is implying that they are human.

Stranger: they are human though, if you look at their genetic makeup

You: and what are you looking at their genetic makeup with?

Stranger: with my niggergoggles?

You: yeah, there's your first problem. with those on, they make niggers blend in with humans.

Stranger: omg

Stranger: is that why they're called niggergoggl....it makes sense now

Stranger: you have lived among themto learn havent you.

You: actually, it is the other way around. By avoiding them, you can continue to increase your intellegence and understand the ruse they are using with their niggergoggles

Stranger: what do i do about my niggerscope and nigdar?

You: the more contact you have with them, the more the niggergoggles bore into your eyes and drain the brain cells from your brain, making your intellegence comparable to theirs

Stranger: you're not telling me i have to get rid of these too?!

You: sorry, but those have got to go.

Stranger: oh my.

You: don't worry, they can be replaced with actual funcioning equipment that was actually made by people, for people.

Stranger: you are truly the hero omegle needs but does not deserve

You: and thus, i am forced to lurk in the depths of the internet, having my wisdom passed on to few people before I must take my leave lest the niggerpatrol find me and place me under their nigger rehabilitation

Stranger: but you fail to understand stranger

Stranger: they may take you down

Stranger: they may scorn you

Stranger: and call you a racist

Stranger: you will be mocked in the public eye

Stranger: but this is bigger than you

Stranger: ...this is niggertastic.

Stranger: and it shall live on as it did long before you were around and long after you are gone...

Stranger: *tears up

You: worry not, for there are more of us, and one day, you will stumble upon our sanctuary and only then, can you live in all your splendor with people who understand

Stranger: i have been negrocated.

Stranger: good talk, good talk.

You: and with that, my job here is complete.

Stranger: i salute you sir

Stranger: you should check out lolmegle, i have a feeling you have funny convos here all the time so mail em in

You: I will be sure to investigate further in my travels

Stranger: niggerout

You: godspeed stranger.

Stranger: godspeed master

You have disconnected.

If you liked this lolmegle sketch you may also like She'sAFishButNotReally, Concoction of the Day, God damn North Koreans and What does that spell