funChat - The game...he won it.

You: Welcome to funChat, Please enter a username from 1-15 characters long...

Stranger: asshat

You: Please enter your username once more for confirmation...

Stranger: asshat

You: Please answer this question to prove you're human!

Stranger: tits or gtfo

You: Correct answer! You have won the game.

Stranger: tight

You have disconnected.

If you liked this lolmegle sketch you may also like funChat #1, funChat #2, The Racistinator...The Jew and The culturally unaware Omegler Pt.1.

funChat - Shocker!

You: Welcome to fun chat, Please enter a username from 1-15 characters long...

Stranger: you m or f

You: Welcome to fun chat, Please enter a username from 1-15 characters long...

You: Welcome to fun chat, Please enter a username from 1-15 characters long...

You: Welcome to fun chat, Please enter a username from 1-15 characters long...

Stranger: lets have computer sex

You: hell yea muthafucka

You: *rapes stranger in the anus

Stranger: you m or f

You: *punches kidneys

You: *slices a 10mm thick hole into stragers side

You: *fingers internal organs

You: ooooo yeaa

You: yesssssssss

You: NNNNEEEARRRRGGHHHHHH

You: *smokes ciggy

You: This fun chat has been TEN FUNS!

Your conversational partner has disconnected.

If you liked this lolmegle sketch you may also like funChat #1, Shocker #1, Shocker #2 and Shocker #3.

Welcome to funChat, have a nice day asshole!

You: Welcome to funChat, Please enter a username from 1-15 characters long...

Stranger: fanny

You: Please enter your username once more for confirmation...

Stranger: fanny

You: Please answer this question to prove you're human!

You: What is the politically incorrect term for a black man?

Stranger: coon

You: Wrong answer...one chance remains...

Stranger: nigga

You: Wrong it's negro...Thank you for partaking in our "racists on omegle" survey, you are 1/1798 who answered incorrectly.
Stranger: no wai its not becaus im racist

You have disconnected.

If you liked this lolmegle sketch you may also like funChat #2, The penis is mightier than the penis and God damn North Koreans...

Omegle - Not a place for all the family.

Emailed in by one of our readers, d41.
Stranger: m/f?
You: Do you want a male or female?
Stranger: f!!!!
You: Okay, let me put my sister on
Stranger: k
You: Z0mg hiiii!! 'sup dood!!!
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

If you liked this lolmegle sketch you may also like To assume is to fail, Lesbian Love <3, and Le Francais aime le cyber!

What does that spell?

Emailed in by one of our readers,  d41.
You: Give me an O!
Stranger: RGASM
You: Give me an M!
You: GIVE ME AN E!
You: GIVE ME A G!
You: GIVE ME AN L!
You: GIVE ME AN E!
Stranger: OMEGLE!
Stranger: now show me your tits
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

If you liked this lolmegle sketch you may also like ShesAFishButNotReally and The Racistinator: The Jew.

Note to self - Gaming legends just aren't appreciated on lolmegle...

Emailed in by one of our readers,  d41.
You: Ready to play pacman?
Stranger: ?????
You: Ok, you make a pacman, like (<
You: Then I make dots ........................
You: Then you pretend to eat the line!
Stranger: (<
You: Ready? Set? GO! .......................................................................................................................................
Stranger: ,
Stranger: (<
Stranger: (<..........
Stranger: (<.....
You: Uh oh, a ghost |"| is coming after you!!!
You: Better make a turn!
Stranger: fuck u
Stranger: im going to play world of warcraft
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

If you liked this lolmegle sketch you might also like Note to self - Strangers do not like mudkipz and Note to self - Omegler's mommas...no go.

Note to self - Strangers do not like mudkipz.

You: do you like mudkipz?

Stranger: whole world please listen to a pity suffering person. the manifesto to those without human nature! i am not a rabbit!!! i am not a rabbit!!!i am not a rabbit!!!i am not a rabbit!!!i am not a rabbit!!!i am not a rabbit!!!i am not a rabbit!!!i am not a rabbit!!! tortures are nothing!!! you make others feel pain is your own hurts!!! finally you will know that, but it is already too late ... mercy leaves you ... you! you are the real shame to our society!!! this is a curse message. i will curse to the time when the hurt is not exist or my death!!! i hate them!!! hate!!!!!! hate!!!!!!!! i can still speak and will pray to my god about those tortures and crime behavior!!!

You: ...sooo i'm guessing you don't like mudkipz.

Your conversational partner has disconnected.

If you liked this lolmegle sketch you might also like Note to self - Gaming legends just aren't appreciated on lolmegle and Note to self - Omegler's momma's...no go.

To assume is to fail.

You: hii

Stranger: im looking for a horny female.xD

You: oh reallllyyyy ;)

You: why what will you do to said femaly ;)

Stranger: yes really

You: if she's reaaaallllyyy horny

Stranger: i will rub yur pussy and bite yur nipples and lick and then yu suck ma dick, enjoy it,choke on it.

You: ohhh myyy

Stranger: yu wanna?

You: wooww

You: na dude im a guy.

You: cool story tho bro!

Stranger: ohh fuck

You: ...faggot.

Your conversational partner has disconnected.

If you liked this lolmegle sketch you may also like Lesbian love <3, Le Francais aime le cyber, and Omegle - Not a place for all the family.

Intolerance Pt. 2

You: Hi. I from China

Your conversational partner has disconnected.

If you liked this lolmegle sketch, you may also like Intolerance Pt. 1 and Sexism on omegle.

Have you found Jesus?

You: hii

Stranger: gay?

You: yes

You: :)

Stranger: me 2 ;

Stranger: )

You: i see

You: soooo

You: ;)

Stranger: how old are u?

You: 19

Stranger: i'm 17

You: i seeeee

You: hmmmm what to do about this situation ;)

Stranger: are u horny now?

You: “Praying always with all prayer and supplication in the Spirit, and watching thereunto with all perseverance and supplication for all saints. (Ephesians 6:18)”

You: im gay for jesus :)

You: let us pray

Your conversational partner has disconnected.

If you liked this lolmegle sketch you may also like Have you found Jesus? #1.

Lesbian Love <3

Emailed in by one of our readers, NF.

You: hii

Stranger: hi

You: how are you?]

Stranger: feel good

Stranger: u?

Stranger: need to cheer up

You: need to cheer up?:)

You: ive got a cure for you

You: checkout lolmegle.com

You: i was on it a few minutes ago

You: cracked me up :)

Stranger: whats that

You: its like a site with hilarious omegle convos

You: pretty original stuff

Stranger: asl?

You: 19/f/sydney

You: you?

Stranger: 22 / f / sweden

You: coool!

Stranger: : )

You: did you check out the site?

Stranger: yes

Stranger: it s huge fun

You: good?

Stranger: : )

You: yaaaaaay

Stranger: i cant stand those dialogues

You: ??

Stranger: like the ones starting with PENIS in caps lock : )

You: awww

You: yea some of them are pretty immature

You: try the knock knock ones

You: they're pretty witty

Stranger: are you straight?

You: sometimes

Stranger: sometimes?

Stranger: i want to try cyber with a girl,

Stranger: would u like to?

You: okaayyy

You: what are you going to do to me? ;)

Stranger: hmm

Stranger: i dont know where to start

Stranger: describe yourself

Stranger: pls

Stranger: i m blonde green eyes 175, 34 C

You: im brunette, brown eyes, huge 10 inch black dick

Stranger: you said female

Stranger: ?

You: suck my dick bitch.

Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Tourrettes just doesn't translate on omegle...

You: hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii

Stranger: heyy

You: FAGGOT.

Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Note to self - Omegler's mommas...no go.

Stranger: I WANNA PUT MY PENIS IN YOUR VAGINA

You: AHHH SHIT.

You: i wanna put my penis in your penis.

Stranger: OH SHIT

Stranger: I WANNA PUT YOUR PENIS IN A BLENDER

You: i wanna put my penis in your mums anus

You: and i did one night

You: and i never called her back.

Stranger: man why you gotta be talking about my mum like that?

Your conversational partner has disconnected.

If you liked this lolmegle sketch you might also like Note to self - Strangers do not like mudkipz and Note to self - Gaming legends just aren't appreciated on lolmegle.

Shocker! Pt. 3

Emailed in by one of our readers, Robrob.

Stranger: asl?

You: 18/f/australia...little horny

You: you?:)

Stranger: sweden m 18 :)

You: how are you?

Stranger: good you? ^^

You: i'm all right

Stranger: good to hear :)

You: cyber?

Stranger: are you good then?

You: yeah

Stranger: you start :)

You: you throw me on the bed and start to remove my panites

Stranger: i start rubbing your stomach and go down slow to your clit and rub it

You: i start to get wet

Stranger: i take my other finger and dip the top in your pussy

You: i moan

Stranger: i'm getting deeper and deeper inside your wet pussy

You: i start to move my hips

Stranger: i'm starting to penetrate my finger in and out your pussy faster and faster

You: you cut a whole in my side and start to fuck it

You: i start to shout

You: you thrust harder

You: and harder

Stranger: hahaha omfg

You: you finally finish inside me

You: i look down at thered and white mess

You: you start to lick it up

Stranger: and i spit in your face with all sperm!

You: i use the knife to cut ur throat

Stranger: sick fuck ;)

You: i start to grind up on ur lifeless body

Your conversational partner has disconnected.

If you liked this lolmegle sketch you may also like Shocker! Pt. 1 and Shocker! Pt. 2.

She'sAFishButNotReally

Emailed in by one of our readers, JC.

You: hello

Stranger: i am a horny male looking for a horny female to swap sexual pictures with possibly through a webcam

You: i have a horny female here

Stranger: ok

You: she is a beautiful, tender, ready to fuck 3.5" kribensis cichlid from the waters of the congo river basin of western africa

Stranger: can i see her tits?

You: well, she's a fish, so she doesn't have mammary glands

Your conversational partner has disconnected.

If you liked this lolmegle sketch you may also like What does that spell? and The Racistinator: The Jew.

Knock knock #2

Emailed in by one of our readers, Roman.

Stranger: hi

You: knock knock

Stranger: who's there

You: justin

Stranger: justin who ?

You: justin smith

Stranger: don't get it

You: ?

You: that's my name

Stranger: ah k :D

Stranger: thought it was going to be a joke

You: what's so funny about my name?

You: : (

Stranger: you have pleny of jokes that start with

Stranger: knock knock

Stranger: than you ask

Stranger: who is there

You: oh okay

You: can i try again

You: knock knock

Stranger: who's there

You: disco!

Stranger: disco who

You: disco...NNECTED

You have disconnected.

If you liked this lolmegle sketch you may also like Knock Knock #1.

Cybermon...I choose you!

Emailed in by one of our readers, Kien.

Stranger: ash?!

You: Hi wana

Stranger: battle??

Stranger: YES

You: k

You: i send charizard

Stranger: k i send out tauros

Stranger: Tauros uses tackle….

You: charizard uses flamethrower

You: it makes tuaros hot…..so hot that he takes off his pants and uses erection...its super effective charizard’s defence has been taken down and he is now ready to fuck tauros

You: charizard uses reach around

You: critical hit

You: Tuaros uses growl….except instead he orgasms

You: i really just wated to cyber, but this battle is just as good

Your conversational partner has disconnected.

The Racistinator... The Jew

Emailed in by one of our readers, Kien.

You: hi

Stranger: Be interesting or leave.

You: yeh k

You: what u want me to do

Stranger: uh

Stranger: be interesting.

You: where u from

Stranger: If you're a nigger, for example, jump around like a monkey.

You: like a porch monkey

Stranger: Yep

You: niggers dont know how to type

You: so im not a nigger...

You: because im using correct syntax.

Stranger: ...Yeah

Stranger: You write exceptionally well, too...

You: and im not taking breaks to take my dads dick in my mouth so i'm definitely not one

Stranger: ...

Stranger: And your sex is?

You: u must really hate niggers..........i hate jews

You: m, u ?

Stranger: hm

Stranger: male

Stranger: also a jew.

You: how much does a holo caust ? $$$$

Stranger: Funny.

You: no seriously its costs about 6 million.

Stranger: ...

You: was that interesting enough

Stranger: No.

You: okay

You: how about u be interesting...i wish u could show me some jew magic like how to turn 5 cents into a multi million dollar sotck portfolio

You: *stock

Stranger: ...

You: or how to sue a multi national corporation for hundreds of thousands of dollars for not implementing affirmative action by finding a loophole in the legal system

You: thats another example of jew magic

You: or making 6 million of ur kind dissapear

You: between 1941 to 1945

 Stranger: Only Jews know Jew secrets.

You: so……………being a jew, how does it feel to be born without self respect

You: ur a sub reptilian species right,.. do u have scales

Stranger: Uhhh

Stranger: Dude

Stranger: Jews are fucking superior

Stranger: Your banker and lawyer are jews while your plumber isn't

You: my jews r actually tied up in my basement

Stranger: Exactly, they've persecuted because they're superior.

Stranger: Had we more strength in numbers, it wouldn

You: my banker is Asian, lawyer is white...but then again your right my plumber isn’t a jew but he does find Jews in my drainage pipes

Your conversational partner has disconnected.
If you liked this lolmegle sketch you may also like She'sAFishButNotReally and What does that spell?

Triple-own - We suspect someone cried themselves to sleep tonight.

Emailed in by one of our readers, GD.
Stranger: ew. its you.

You: my dick

You: you can suckle hard on it.

Stranger: is short

You: beats your mums

Stranger: your mommas dead

You: yeah after seeing your face

You: who wouldnt be.

Stranger: loser

Your conversational partner has disconnected.

If you liked this lolmegle conversation you may also like Double own.

The penis is mightier than the penis

Emailed in by one of our readers, JD.
Stranger: hi i am boy germany 20...you girl? want me webcamsex? My Penis 18 centimeters :)

You: yes please

Stranger: you have webcam?

You: yes

Stranger: your messenger id?

You: xxxxx@live.com.au

Stranger: okay

Stranger: wait 1 min

You: yes

Stranger: add you

You: yes i see now

Stranger: xxxxx@hotmail.com

Stranger: my messenger

Stranger: accept me

You: i have 20 cm penis

Your conversational partner has disconnected.

If you liked this lolmegle sketch you may also like funChat #1, Double Own, Triple Own, and Cybermon...I choose you!

God damn North Koreans...

Emailed in by one of our readers, DB.

Stranger: hi

Stranger: asl

Stranger: from?

You: 18 m holland

You: u?

Stranger: 18 f korea

You: oke cool

You: north or south?

Stranger: south

You: north?

Stranger: non

Stranger: south

You: you are in north korea now?

Stranger: non

You: huh?

You: so you are in north korea?

Stranger: no i'm south korea

You: huh

You: you just said north

Stranger: no i'm south

You: how is north korea?

Stranger: i don'k know well

You: but you are there now aren't you?

Stranger: yea

You: in north korea?

Stranger: nope i'm south korea

You: huh

You: wenn u go to south korea?

Stranger: i'm korean

You: north or south?

Stranger: south

You: so you are in north korea?

Stranger: no

Stranger: i'm in south kore

Stranger: korea

You: north?

Stranger: south

You: north?

Stranger: south

Stranger: i'm south korean

You: cool many ppl here are from south korean but you are from north right?

Stranger: why u said north?

You: so you are north korea?

Stranger: no

Stranger: i'm south korea

You: north or south?

Stranger: south

You: north?

Stranger: i'm south korean

Stranger: why u that said again north

You: beacause you are north right?

Stranger: no

Stranger: no

Stranger: no

Stranger: no

Stranger: no

Stranger: mo

Stranger: no

Stranger: i'm south korean

You: north or south?

Stranger: south

You: north?

Stranger: south

You: were do u live in north korea?

Stranger: no

You: north?

Your conversational partner has disconnected.